A woven ode to my sister
Sisters are funny things to have. I have one fully biological sister. She is older, and sassier than I could ever hope to be. It was her birthday in April and I was faced with the annual challenge of deciding on a present for her. I am normally pretty good at nailing present selections as a point of pride. In most instances people can expect a sincere and well-thought through gift or they can expect nothing. It’s just how I roll, social conventions be dammed. I would rather give you nothing than give you a sub-par gift. This year was going to be particularly challenging for finding a present for my sister, with limited money all I had was time.
My sister and I have had a challenging relationship for as long as I can remember. My childhood memories are heavily interspersed with vivid images of running through the house screaming at each other and some of the most brutal arguments I have ever had with anyone - they would be, we are each others protector and destroyer. But this complex relationship does not undermine the deep and primal love I feel for my sister. She always had the courage to say the things I couldn’t; she taught me by example to be resilient to the assholeyness that exists in the world; and she inspired me to be creative. My sister studied Theatre Studies, so I studied Theatre Studies, she studied photography at high school and I studied it at University. I was your typical copy-cat younger sister.
Whilst I have left photography behind, my sister has surged forward. My humble, barley competent craft skills are nothing compared to the hours she has dedicated to learning her photographic craft in colour-grading, costuming, locations, equipment and every other damn thing she has taught herself. With each new artwork she creates I have a new favourite and my awe for her grows more immense. [I would share some of her images but I know she doesn’t always want to be identified. After she reads this she might let me share some… so stay tuned.]
But how do I capture all these complex emotions in a perfect birthday present? I wanted to create something for my sister that would
Reference our childhood
Acknowledge my younger sister obsession
Demonstrate my adoration of the person she has grown into
Early on I decided it would have to be a custom weaving. A custom weaving is low-cost but takes careful preparation, execution and a lot of time. The first challenge is always to find a suitable image. I spent many evenings pouring over old family photos and talking to my partner about the significance of various images and events.
It came down to two key images and it struck me that both images highlighted a jealousy that I had held onto for many years (too many some might say).
Image one was a photo of my sister in the snow. She is dressed as a witch and has a paper cut-out cat by her leg. The image was taken in our front yard on a very rare occasion when it snowed in Mt.Evelyn. I phoned mum to find out more about this image:
You know that photo of Mel in the snow at our old house - why is Mel dressed like a witch?
“ I think she was dressed as Meg [from children’s book Meg & Mog]. It must have been a school dress up day.”
And why isn’t there a photo of me in the snow?
“I don’t know.”
I think you can get an idea about what I might be jealous about. On the one day that heavy snowfalls are experienced in the outer eastern suburbs of Melbourne, there is a photo of my sister dressed as the cutest damn witch in town and not a shred of evidence that I even exist - you win this round sister.
Image two is also a photo of my sister. It is her first day of school and she is striking the sassiest pose ever sported by a youngster. In her right hand she casually clutches a Donald Duck satchel bag. I don’t remember the bag as such, but I always remembered the photo of the bag. A bag that was surely cooler than any bag I have ever owned. Its crisp Donald Duck colours of blue, yellow and white were etched into my mind. I have been forever jealous of that bag. So jealous that when I went to Disney for the first time on a holiday to Japan in 2018 - I sought out a bag as close to that one as I could to satiate those jealous feelings. I’m calling this round a draw!
Now when I look at the image I see the young girl who is going to grow up to be the fierce, spirited, creative sister that I now know and love. This is the image I have to create for her - this is the image that for me represents our childhood, my predictable adoration of my sister, and the strength of character that she has in bucket loads.
All that remained was time to make this present for her. The opportunity arose when I was sent to Perth, Western Australia for work. I arranged to go ahead of time and booked in a crafternoon for a rainy Perth Saturday with a dear friend. I estimated my yarn allowances and packed my loom, needle and scissors and off I went. I managed to complete about half the weaving during the crafternoon.
I had doubts about my flesh colour and couldn’t proceed without a visit to Spotlight to pick a more appropriate child’s flesh colour. I then continued to work on the weaving in the evenings after work further unpicking and scrutinising the shape of the leg, the shape of the hair, the progress of the stripes of the dress.
With the work still not complete it was time for me to hit the road and undertake my maiden [eww that doesn’t sound right] voyage across the Australian Nullarbor. Toting the weaving around with me I snatched blocks of five minutes here and there to progress the weaving. At one stage when I had decided I needed to unpick a small section, a random trucker became very interested in what I was ‘constructing’ and it struck me that perhaps Truck Stop Trucker Lounges are not usually buzzing centres of creativity. It took another couple of evenings after I arrived home before I was happy with the work and considered it complete. Carefully tying it off and giving it a gentle iron to set the stitches the work was finished in time for a family event the following Sunday.
I hung the weaving on our wall and told my sister that her present was on display somewhere in our house. I said that she would know it when she saw it. To be honest I think she had to look at it twice before realising that it was her in the weaving. She smiled, called me a cheapskate and gave me a warm hug [later clarifying that she called me a cheapskate because she was overwhelmed with emotions so covered them with an insult].
Perhaps initially the image did not hold quite as much significance to her as it did to me - but I hope this blog post will go some way in expressing my sisterly affection for her. (and yeah - I pretty much said at the top of the blog that I was gonna be a cheapskate on this present but it’s got bucket loads of emotions.)
Happy birthday Sister - I couldn’t be more proud/jealous of who you have grown to be.